Your Nanny: Hot or Not?
Are good looks a drawback in a nanny? A quick look at the classified ads shows parents want their babysitter to be experienced, reliable and trustworthy, among other things, but is there also an unspoken preference for someone whose appearance is, well, unremarkable?
Some of my mom friends have said they would never hire a nanny who is better looking than they are. Dads seem uncomfortable with the idea, as well. In a post about au pairs that I wrote in February, one reader said he didn’t think his wife would like having an attractive 20-something woman living in their house; “I wouldnÂ’t do anything, but why introduce the temptation?”
The recent troubles actor Rob Lowe and his wife have had with their nanny also highlight how the personal nature of a family’s relationship with a babysitter can lead to uncomfortable situations.
The cliché of the nanny as temptress is alive and well in popular culture but is it fair to take these stereotypes into account when selecting our children’s caretaker? Another reader in the au pair post seemed to think so: “You have the opportunity to interview the prospective au pairs at length so if you donÂ’t want a hot one, donÂ’t get a hot one.”
The inherent sexism of this practice should be acknowledged, since relative attractiveness doesn’t seem to come up when considering a male babysitter (though they deal with stereotyping issues of their own — see this September post on “mannies”).
Ideally, shouldn’t we pick a babysitter based on her (or his) ability to provide quality care to our kids? If she happens to look like Scarlett Johansson, well, so be it. So far we’ve always sent our kids to caretakers outside our home, so the issue has never come up. Readers, would you discriminate against an attractive nanny?
Sara Schaefer Muñoz is on vacation until Tuesday, April 15.
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