Should You Take the Day Off for Your Kid’s Birthday?

In the constant calibration of work/family priorities, where should kids’ birthdays stand? Pretty darn high on the roster, some parents we’ve talked with here say.

The issue came into stark relief for me this week. I was on deck to edit a very interesting story — one that would surely keep me late given the time of the expected news event. I was reluctant to hand it off, but it was my kid’s seventh birthday. After a couple of days of rumination, I realized it wasn’t a close call — I asked a colleague to cover for me. He gladly agreed. When my son out of the blue later said “Mommy, please don’t be home late tomorrow,” I breathed a sigh of relief knowing I had made the right decision.

Another Journal editor, Lisa Vickery, years ago told me she followed a rule pronounced by another Journal working mom: Never work on your kids’ birthdays. Once you’re in the office, it’s hard to turn down breaking assignments and who knows when you’ll get home. If you’re off campus, you’re better insulated.

Now, Lisa’s kids are older and she’s less strict about adhering to the rule — her teenagers would rather hang with friends, she says. But heading to work on birthdays still leaves her with mixed feelings. She has to be in early and doesn’t see her kids in the morning. When her son turned 14 earlier this year, she didn’t want him opening presents without her at breakfast. The compromise was that he got a couple to open at breakfast but the others had to wait until the evening.

Men, of course, face these conflicts, too. Pfizer CEO Jeffrey Kindler had to leave his teenager’s birthday breakfast to deal with a significant problem at the company back in Dec. 2006.

Readers, how do you manage your children’s birthdays with your work commitments?

(Birthday photo by Madaise via Flickr)